I’ve always wanted to try my hand at competitive eating. You know, like that show, Man vs. Food, where everyone in the restaurant cheers and chants for you. I have a pretty large capacity for food, I just don’t exercise it very often, so I think people underestimate me.
But anyways, these food challenges intrigue me, not to mention the reward of having my picture on their wall of fame. Heyoo! It’s like testing my strength as a human…and I want to see if I can keep up with the boys. People’s doubts only fan the flame of my competitive spirit.
I present to you the Cheeburger Cheeburger challenge!
When I ordered the burger, I asked, “Hey, don’t you guys have a bell or anything so people know I’m doing the challenge? Like don’t people chant or anything?” And the waiter said, “No, they only ring the bell when you beat the burger,” and then walked away.
I tried to make it interactive by cheering for myself and pumping my fists.
I only got weird looks.
I got the pounder with cheddar cheese, sauteed onions, chopped garlic, and barbeque sauce. I also had a diet coke on the side, and a couple of onion rings and fries.
My strategy in this was to eat it as fast as I could, because once I feel full, it’s over. I barely talked during lunch, and decided to eat the meat hanging out the sides of the bun first.
When I finished with the meat, I ate the burger like any burger, but pressed it down so I could eat it fast and it would take up less volume, even though it’d be denser. A busgirl came by to clear our plates. She had a sticker on her that said, “Hello, my name is ___, and I will be taking your pounder picture today.” I said to her, “Hi, ___, it looks like you will be taking my picture today!”
I was fine until the last third of the burger when I started feeling full, and the burger just tasted so…beefy. The diet coke really helped cut the greasy feeling, even though I thought it could also fill me up. But honestly, I think it’s what saved me.
My mouth is jacked up because I had 2-3 canker sores in my mouth that hurt so bad. I would have backed out, but then I think RJ and everyone thought I was going to because I couldn’t do it. Pride beats pain any day.
Look how excited RJ is for me! My picture is on the wall at the Carmel Mountain Cheeburger Cheeburger in San Diego. LOOK FOR ME!
Afterwards, I was surprisingly okay. It just kind of felt like I ate at a buffet. I took a nice two hour nap afterwards. And I only gained a pound (I suppose that’s about right), which I’m pretty sure I’ve pooped out by now.
I win, burger. You lose.